THE TRUTH ABOUT BULLIES

Statistics

Bullying is an epidemic.  The research and statistics on this issues is quite startling.  According to MBNBD (Make a sound for a voice unheard) 

- “1 in 7 Students in Grades K-12 is either a bully or a victim of bullying.

- 56% of students have personally witnessed some type of bullying at school.

- 15% of all school absenteeism is directly related to fears of being bullied at school.

- 71% of students report incidents of bullying as a problem at their school.

- 1 out of 20 students has seen a student with a gun at school.

- 282,000 students are physically attacked in secondary schools each month.

- Those in the lower grades reported being in twice as many fights as those in the higher grades. However, there is a lower rate of serious violent crimes in the elementary level than in the middle or high schools.

- 90% of 4th through 8th graders report being victims of bullying

- Among students, homicide perpetrators were more than twice as likely as homicide victims to have been bullied by peers.

- Bullying statistics say revenge is the strongest motivation for school shootings.

- 87% of students said shootings are motivated by a desire to “get back at those who have hurt them.”

Scenerios

I have been asking my self a few questions like:  Why some children are so angry?  What is the cause of their pain?  What can I do to solve this problem?  Based on the information I’ve gathered I believe bullying is the repetition of negative actions toward self, projected onto another, with the intent to gain power or control over an internal battle.  The internal battle is usually caused by experiences created at home, which is where initial learning takes place.  To explore such a theory let's look at three different cases below.

1.     Parents, have you ever told your child no he/she can’t do something without a reason behind it other than, “because I said so,” or “I am the parent?” From a child’s perspective, no is a rejection from the person/people he/she admires and loves the most.  No means, I am not good enough (to receive an explanation), no means, I am not worthy, no means, I must protect myself from the world because if I don’t I will get hurt, no means, "every man for himself," no means, I cannot be trusted.  When that child reaches adulthood, asking or requesting for what he wants becomes problematic all because of one thing, FEAR of rejection. 

2.     In other cases children who are told, “yes go ahead mom has

to… “ These children are left alone to explore the world through art, music, luxury, free will and good fortune.  They usually have a similar experience to the children above in the form of lack of love, self-esteem, worth, commitment, etc.  While the parents are out drinking, having fun with their friends, working, starting new businesses, educating themselves, or just plain 'ole' busy, these children are searching for attention elsewhere.  In doing so, they become co-dependent.  They cling to the first person who shows them love, adoration, and affection. Their biggest fear is lost or abandonment.  Therefore, they are hardly ever alone for long periods of time.  They move from one relationship to the next in hope to find the right one.  When they do, their biggest fear is abandonment.

3.     Then you have children who appear to be intelligent beyond their years, may feel out of place in the classroom environment and even at home, partake in conversations about the world on a higher level, their intuitive minds are extremely powerful,  they are the bearers of the truth, and believe in world peace and harmony.  They show up as isolated, anti-social or extremely social, emotionally sensitive and misunderstood.  They often feel dis-empowered.  Their purpose is to bring forth memory that will catapult our thinking to the next level.  However, parents who are unconscious about who these children are consider them to be rude, disrespectful, dark and rebellious.  They are attention seekers mostly in the form of dress, at times behavior, mood and emotional outbursts. 

In all three cases the one thing that is missing is SELF LOVE.   What can we do to teach our kids how to love themselves? We could start by accepting ourselves as divine, accepting our children as healers on this planet, and finally taking ownership for everything we experience.  Each and every day of their lives our children reveal information to us for our ascension.  And yes, at times it isn't presented to us in a pretty little box with a bow on  top.  Therefore, instead of looking at the behavior, focus on the theme, the message, or the result.

For example: If you find yourself constantly and consistently discussing the same issue with your child ask your self two simple questions: What is the lesson?   Where am I doing the same or similar thing in my life?  How can I use this information to transform the relationship I have with myself and family?

Have you ever dealt with the following situation at home?  If so, consider the questions that follows.

Broken dishes: Where do I break my word? How often do I break my word? Do I honor or respect my word?

Lying: Where am I not being honest with my self?  What are the lies I tell myself?

Stealing: What are my conversations about lack? What are my limited beliefs?

Sneaking around: What am I afraid to reveal?

The Bully

Who is the bully?  The bully we see outside of ourselves is the bully we have within.  If you are triggered or get upset at a bully or a victim just ask yourself: where am I bullying or have bullied?  Do I truly love my neighbor (or brother) for who he is, or am I trying to change or mold him to fit inside a box?  Do I give forth the things that really don’t serve me or the planet, or do I justify them by manifesting people in my life to support my beliefs just to be right?  Do I judge others (myself) harshly?

Look around you!  Children are duplicating what they experience through their senses.  Can we truly, authentically and honesty tell a child to “stop being a bully” when as adults we’ve mastered the art of manipulation by being a silent, under cover, back door bully ourselves?  Yes, there are areas in our lives that are working for the goodness of everyone around us, but not as a whole (planet), how do I know, look at the results.   We are still having internal battles that are projected onto our children, friends, family, and the world at large.  How many times have you beaten yourself up for something you “think you did wrong?”  How often do you kill ideas that are not your own in fear of becoming "second best?"  When was the last time you mentored someone or supported someone in fulfilling a life long dream?  Have you ever disliked someone because your friend is having a problem or issue with that person?  When was the last time you smiled at a stranger?

Our children are crying out for help and the inner child in us understand what it feels like to be alone, frightened, lost and worse of all misunderstood. We could all make a difference by first healing the inner bully and give it forth. You are not your story.  Stop being victims of our own damnation.  We are truly all here to serve one another in a way that will have us all be winners.  No one is left behind.  The next step is to stand firmly in our individual greatness.  And finally live love, be love and give love to everyone no matter what.   Love unconditionally.  Love because love is.   Love like it is the last time you will ever love.  Lets support our youth today by loving their process of mastering this game called LIFE.

Facts on  bullying http://www.makebeatsnotbeatdowns.org?facts_new.html